Lonely nights

He let out a shaky, drawn out moan into the man's mouth. His legs spread a little wider as his hips began to rock into Felix's hand, a little jerkily at first before his movements became smoother, arching.

"...Oh..."

This was different from everything that they had shared before. He felt vulnerable, open, but it felt good. This made him feel so close to Felix, closer than he had ever felt before. Even closer than that day in the library.

Summoning his courage, his hand slipped underneath Felix's waistband to stroke him tentatively, caught breathless by both Felix touching him, and from just the idea that he was touching Felix in this way.

His free hand moved to cup Hideaki's cheek, pressing their forehead together as they lay beside one another.

His hand continued to move at the same pace, his pumps becoming more fluid as Hideaki movements became smoother.

Felix's mouth fell open as he gave a quiet groan as Hideaki touched him, his pelvis moving forward to press up against his hand.

His body shivered softly, he had not expected this when he crawled into the bed, he didn't think Hideaki would be able to deal with him touching him like this, the man was braver then he thought.

He felt self-conscious about his expressions, being face-to-face with Felix like this. The expressions he made must look disgusting, he thought. He loved being close to Felix like this, but it did make him feel self-conscious.

Hideaki buried his head into Felix's neck, letting out quiet pants and whimpers into the skin, hips jerking against the man's hand. His hand began to move over Felix's skin slowly, lips falling open.

"...Felix..."

Felix gave moaned as Hideaki's hand moved against him, his hips jerked against his hand before settling and moving with him slowly.

His free hand moved to the back of his head, threading his fingers through the dark locks of hair.

The hand that was stroking Hideaki slowly sped up, pumping him a little harder, it was the first time he had touch the man like this so he wanted to make sure that he was thoroughly satisfied.

Hideaki flushed a little as he heard Felix moan, hand speeding up to match Felix's pace. He wanted to make him moan like that again.

He moaned again softly, a long, keening noise as his hips pushed up against the man's hand. Slowly, he was starting to care less about feeling embarrassed. He couldn't think about other things at the moment, when Felix was touching him like this.

Leaning up, he pressed his lips to Felix's again, glancing up to gaze at his face.

Felix's hand caressed Hideaki's shoulder softly, his thumb stroking small circles in against the soft fabric.

Slowly his hand smoothed its way down his spine, laying to rest on the man's lower back.

Felix's body shivered softly, another soft moan escaping his lips as the hand around his arousal sped up to match his pace.

He gazed down at Hideaki, kissing him deeply as his hand smoothed over the smaller man's backside softly.

A shiver ran down his spine at the moan, loving the way those noises made him felt, how he was the one who made Felix make those noises, and how those noises were entirely, uniquely Felix's. Nobody else had the same voice, that same smooth timbre which sent a rush of warmth through him like this.

It was just Felix.

His back arched a little as Felix's hand skimmed down his spine, pressing forwards into the man's hand with a noise somewhere between a moan and a whine uttered into Felix's mouth.

Felix's hand slid under Hideaki's pajama pants, caressing the man's backside softly, the more her got use to Felix's touch the more he was willing to do, he was just being sure to go too fast.

His mouth trailed kissed down the man's neck, nipping softly at the skin every so often.

The hand that resided on Hideaki's backside slide back up, playing with the hem of his shirt as he pushed it up his torso.

He whimpered quietly as Felix's hand stroked over his behind, hips jerking against the man's hand with a quiet moan. His heart raced a little faster.

It had been a long time since he had done this, and he could remember very little of it. He couldn't remember how much it had hurt, and he didn't know what to expect, and it frightened him a little, but it was Felix.

If it was Felix, he could do this.

A soft whine slipped from between his lips as Felix trailed soft kisses and nips down his neck, head tilting back as his eyes slid closed in bliss. He almost didn't notice his shirt being pushed up his torso, but when he did, he tensed a little in the man's arms.

It wasn't that he didn't want to do this, just that... he was self-conscious about his body. He hoped Felix would understand.

He gave a quiet moan as Hideaki pressed up against his hands and moaned.

Every little noise that he made had Felix purring softly, he loved it when he reacted positively to his touch or tilted his head for more.

Felix slowed down, feeling Hideaki tense up.
"Are you alright?"
He asked breathlessly, if the man wanted him to slow down or stop what he was doing he was willing to do so.

Hideaki whimpered quietly as Felix slowed down, hips jerking upwards again needily. He didn't like showing his body, and he was nervous, but... he didn't want Felix to stop. He loved the feeling of being close to Felix like this.

But he knew that if they were going to continue, he would have to take his clothes off eventually.

He nodded, leaning up to kiss him softly.

"Please don't stop." he murmured.

A smile spread across his face as Hideaki spoke.
If this is what the older man wanted, he was more than willing to give it to him.

Slowly he pulled his shirt over his head, exposing his torso. Felix lowered his head and trailed kisses across his chest as his hands slid back down Hideaki's body.

One hand continued to stroke the man's arousal as his other caressed his backside.

Hideaki screwed his eyes shut tightly as Felix took his shirt off, suddenly feeling a lot more exposed. A breath hitched at the back of his throat again, arching into Felix's hand as lips brushed across his chest and a hand caressed his backside, letting out a soft whine.

He slowly began to relax, eyes fluttering open to gaze down at him hazily, a quiet moan slipping from his lips.

Felix trailed kisses down Hideaki's chest, his tongue dipping into the older man's navel softly as his hands gripped the waistband of his pants.

He pulled Hideaki's pants and underwear over his hips and let the material slide across his thighs as he pushed them down the man's legs.

His tongue delved into his navel again before he moved lower and placed a kiss on his now exposed member.

The muscles in his stomach and legs tensed in anticipation as Felix's lips moved down his torso, his breaths becoming soft pants and barely-audible whimpers as they moved lower. His back arched a little as a tongue swiped around his navel, shuddering softly.

He loved these soft kisses and licks, but he loved them even more so because it was Felix who was doing this. It made him feel safe and secure, but more than anything, closer to Felix than ever before.

Hideaki's eyes screwed shut again tightly in embarrassment as his trousers and underwear were pulled off, lifting a hand to cover his face.

A choked, gasping moan hitched at the back of his throat as Felix's lips brushed against him, hips jerking automatically.

Felix swiped his tongue along Hideaki's length, his hands moving to stroke the man's sides before gliding down and littering his thighs with gentle caresses.

He wanted to coo reassuring words to the man, but instead he decided to show Hideaki that everything was alright, rather than tell him.

He lowered his head and took the man into his mouth, sucking softly before he began bobbing his head.

He drew a deep, shuddering breath, trying to control the movements of his hips as he squirmed on the bed, whimpering softly.

A shudder rippled through his body at the gentle caresses, legs spreading apart a little more.

His teeth bit into his hand to muffle a moan. He didn't want to make these embarrassing noises and expressions. It was something he was unused to. He was usually in control of his actions and kept a strict guard on what he said or did, but at a time like this, he was unable to monitor his reactions.

Felix caressed his thighs, rubbing his thumbs in gentle circles before one of his hands slipped under Hideaki's back side, stroking his entrance softly, getting the man use to his touch.

His mouth moved a little faster, sucking him softly as his tongue laved over the head of his erection, giving the sensitive nerves the attention that they needed.

He let out a gentle moan as his hands and mouth caressed and cared for the man. Hideaki's own muffled moans only made him want to please the man more.

Hideaki shuddered lightly as a finger stroked over his entrance, tensing a little at the intimate touch. He slowly started to adjust to the light touches, hips rocking quickly against the man's mouth, muffled whines and moans muffled against his hand.

He reached out suddenly to tangle his hands in the man's hair as Felix's tongue darted over the head of his arousal, hips bucking upwards with a louder, uncontrolled moan.

"...Felix..."

Felix's mouth slid from Hideaki's arousal, he gazed up at the man with loving silver eyes as he began to suck on his own fingers, laving his tongue over them generously.

"Hideaki, try to relax, I'm going to be as gentle with you as possible."

He muttered softly, his breaths coming in light pants as he moved his hand back under the man's backside, pressing his index finger against him, slowly pushing it in a small amount.

He moved Hideaki's legs with his free hand, placing the man's feet on the back and bending his knees into the air as he gave his arousal another lick before leaning forwards and kissing him, his free hand moving to stroke his neck.

Hideaki whimpered quietly as Felix pulled away from his arousal, hips jerking upwards one last time before stilling on the mattress.

Taking a deep breath, he nodded, watching Felix lave his tongue over his own fingers, both made nervous and hypnotised by the motion.

He tried to resist the temptation to squirm as Felix's finger pushed into him, biting down on his lip. It wasn't painful, exactly, but it was a bit uncomfortable, and it felt a little intrusive to have something inside him like that.

But when he looked up at Felix, and remembered it was him... he didn't mind that feeling, because it was him.

He let out a quiet moan as the man's tongue stroked up his arousal again, kissing him back enthusiastically, fingers winding into the man's hair.

Felix deepened their kiss, his tongue grazing over his lip softly before giving it a soft nip.

Slowly he pushed the length of his finger into the man, holding it still for a moment, letting him adjust to the feeling, he could tell by how tight Hideaki was that it had been a long time since anyone had touched him like this.

He thrust his finger slowly, pushing it in and out until Hideaki's body was more accepting.

He gave a soft groan and pushed in the second finger, stilling for a moment then continuing with his thrusts as his second hand moved to pump is lover's arousal.

He inhaled softly as the rest of his lover's finger pushed into him, legs tightening around Felix's shoulders with a whine. His eyes closed, hips beginning to rock against the hand as he became accustomed to the sensation, letting out a low moan.

His body was slowly starting to relax as Felix pushed in the second finger, tensing suddenly with a whimper, biting down sharply on his lower lip. The stretching pain wasn't unbearable, but he could feel it starting, and he knew that it was only going to get more painful.

But as Felix's hand began to stroke him again, he was distracted for a moment, hips rolling upwards with a low keening noise.

Felix continued to kiss Hideaki's neck, trying to distract the man from the discomfort with gentle touches elsewhere.

The hand on his lover's arousal pumped him a little faster and more firmly, kissing the man's lips as he bit into it and his body tensed.

"It's alright Hideaki, just don't tense up."
He cooed gently as he began to move his fingers more, thrusting them slowly, curling and twisting them inside the man before he gently scissored his fingers apart, not too far at first but slowly preparing the man.

He let out another long, keening moan, hips rolling upwards quickly as Felix pumped him faster, his head lolling back against the pillow.

There was something almost pleasurable about this, he thought, as Felix began to move his fingers. The pleasure felt as though it was slowly building as the pain went away.

A quiet whine escaped him as he began to rock against the fingers entering him, legs spreading a little wider.